Positively Punny: 150+ Opossum Jokes That’ll Make You Grin

Introduction:

Opossums, those nocturnal marsupials with adorable faces and a knack for playing possum when startled, have inspired some truly pun-tastic humor. Whether you’re a wildlife enthusiast or just looking for a good laugh,

We’ve gathered over 150+ opossum jokes that are bound to tickle your funny bone. So, let’s dive right into the world of opossum hilarity!

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Classic Opossum Opossum Jokes:

1. Why did the opossum bring a ladder? Because it wanted to play “possum” up high!
2. What do you call an opossum that loves math? A calcu-later!
3. Why don’t opossums play hide and seek? Because they always “play dead”!
4. What did one opossum say to the other? “I’m just hanging around.”
5. How do opossums send secret messages? By playing opossum code!
6. Why was the opossum invited to the comedy club? Because it had a killer “dead”pan!
7. What’s an opossum’s favorite game show? “Playing Dead or Not!”
8. What did the opossum say to its friend? “Let’s hang out tonight!”
9. Why did the opossum bring a broom to the party? Because it wanted to sweep everyone off their feet!
10. What’s an opossum’s favorite song? “Play That Dead Funky Music”!
11. How do opossums throw a party? They “hang” decorations and play “dead” tunes!
12. Why did the opossum get an award? For its outstanding acting skills in “playing possum”!
13. What did the opossum say to the comedian? “You’re stealing my act!”
14. How do opossums settle disputes? They have a “play dead” contest!
15. What do you call a group of opossums? A “posse” of opossums!
16. Why was the opossum a great chef? Because it always “cooked” up a surprise!
17. What’s an opossum’s favorite movie genre? Suspenseful “play dead” dramas!
18. Why did the opossum bring a pillow to the picnic? So it could have a comfy “play dead” nap!
19. What’s an opossum’s favorite Shakespeare play? “Much Ado About Playing Possum”!
20. What do you get when you cross an opossum with a kangaroo? A marsu-possum!
21. Why did the opossum start a band? Because it had a “dead”ly good sense of rhythm!
22. What did the opossum say after a long day? “I’m pooped, time to play ‘possum’!”
23. Why did the opossum start a detective agency? Because it was great at “playing dead” and solving cold cases!
24. What did the opossum say when it got a job as a security guard? “I’ll be the best ‘play dead’ night watchman ever!”
25. How do opossums take selfies? They just “hang” around until the timer goes off!
26. Why don’t opossums need to buy Halloween costumes? They’ve got “playing dead” down to an art!
27. What’s an opossum’s favorite dance move? The “Possum Shuffle”!
28. Why was the opossum always calm? Because it had mastered the art of “playing possum” in stressful situations!
29. What’s an opossum’s favorite social media platform? “Possumgram”!
30. What do you call an opossum’s autobiography? “Playing Possum: My Life and Times”!
31. Why did the opossum bring a backpack to the party? To carry all its “playing dead” tricks!
32. What’s an opossum’s favorite board game? “Dead-ly Pursuit”!
33. Why did the opossum become a yoga instructor? To teach everyone the art of “playing dead” and staying Zen!
34. What’s an opossum’s favorite subject in school? “Possumetry”!
35. What did the opossum say to the fortune teller? “Am I destined to keep ‘playing dead’ forever?”
36. How do opossums stay calm during exams? They rely on their “playing dead” meditation techniques!
37. Why was the opossum always invited to poker night? Because it had the best “poker face” while “playing dead”!
38. What’s an opossum’s favorite music genre? “Possum-rock”!
39. Why don’t opossums make good comedians? Because their “playing dead” jokes are too realistic!
40. What’s an opossum’s favorite Shakespeare quote? “To ‘play dead’ or not to ‘play dead’—that is the question!”
41. Why did the opossum apply for a job at the library? Because it loved “playing dead” silent!
42. What’s an opossum’s favorite superhero? “Possum-man”!
43. Why did the opossum become a firefighter? Because it knew how to handle high-pressure situations without “playing dead”!
44. What’s an opossum’s favorite book? “The Art of ‘Playing Dead’: A Possum’s Guide”!
45. Why don’t opossums ever get lost? Because they have a built-in “playing dead” GPS!
46. What’s an opossum’s favorite game at the arcade? “Whack-a-Possum”!
47. Why did the opossum get a job in construction? Because it was an expert at “building” suspense while “playing dead”!
48. What’s an opossum’s favorite sport? “Possumball”!
49. Why did the opossum audition for a role in a horror movie? Because it could “play dead” better than anyone else!
50. What’s an opossum’s favorite ice cream flavor? “Possumberry”!
51. Why did the opossum become a lifeguard? Because it was great at “playing dead” in the water!

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Opossum Jokes Collection:

52. What’s an opossum’s favorite video game? “Possum Crossing”!
53. Why did the opossum become a gardener? Because it had a natural talent for “planting” itself while “playing dead”!
54. What’s an opossum’s favorite holiday? “Possumween”!
55. Why did the opossum become a stand-up comedian? Because its “playing dead” act always brought down the house!
56. What’s an opossum’s favorite movie genre? “Possum-thriller”!
57. Why did the opossum apply for a job at the bakery? Because it wanted to “roll over” dough instead of “playing dead”!
58. What’s an opossum’s favorite planet? “Possumus”!
59. Why did the opossum become a chef? Because it could “play dead” with flavors in the kitchen!
60. What’s an opossum’s favorite car? A “Possum-mobile”!
61. Why did the opossum become a DJ? Because it knew how to “spin” records without “playing dead”!

62. What’s an opossum’s favorite hobby? “Possuming” around!
63. Why did the opossum become an astronaut? To show that it could “play dead” even in zero gravity!
64. What’s an opossum’s favorite magic trick? The disappearing “possum” act!
65. Why did the opossum apply for a job as a detective? Because it could “unplay” dead mysteries!
66. What’s an opossum’s favorite weather? “Possumy” skies!
67. Why did the opossum become a musician? Because it had a “dead”ly good sense of rhythm!
68. What’s an opossum’s favorite vegetable? “Possumatoes”!
69. Why did the opossum become a lifecoach? Because it could help you conquer your fears of “playing dead”!
70. What’s an opossum’s favorite dessert? “Possumon pie”!
71. Why did the opossum become a motivational speaker? Because it could inspire anyone to stop “playing dead” and start living!
72. What’s an opossum’s favorite workout? “Possumcise”!
73. Why did the opossum start a band with raccoons? Because they wanted to create “trashy” music together!
74. What’s an opossum’s favorite social gathering? A “Possum Potluck”!
75. Why did the opossum join the circus? Because it was the star of the “playing dead” show!
76. What’s an opossum’s favorite type of art? “Possum-pressionism”!
77. Why did the opossum become a lifeguard at the swimming pool? Because it could do the perfect “floating dead” impression!
78. What’s an opossum’s favorite instrument? The “possumphone”!
79. Why did the opossum become a therapist? Because it could help you work through your issues without “playing dead”!
80. What’s an opossum’s favorite sport to watch? “Possum Racing”!
81. Why did the opossum become a pilot? To prove it could “fly” without “playing dead”!
82. What’s an opossum’s favorite fruit? “Possumgranate”!
83. Why did the opossum apply for a job as a librarian? Because it could “shhh” like a pro without “playing dead”!
84. What’s an opossum’s favorite computer game? “PossumCraft”!
85. Why did the opossum become a lifeguard at the beach? Because it knew how to “ride the waves” without “playing dead”!
86. What’s an opossum’s favorite superhero team? The “Justice Possums”!
87. Why did the opossum audition for a role in a comedy movie? Because it could make people laugh without “playing dead”!
88. What’s an opossum’s favorite place to travel? “Possumtano”!
89. Why did the opossum become a veterinarian? Because it could “heal” animals without “playing dead”!
90. What’s an opossum’s favorite constellation? “Possumus Major”!
91. Why did the opossum apply for a job at the zoo? Because it could “hang” with all the other animals without “playing dead”!
92. What’s an opossum’s favorite video game character? “Super Mario Possum”!
93. Why did the opossum become a lifeguard at the lake? Because it could “float” like a champ without “playing dead”!
94. What’s an opossum’s favorite snack? “Possumnuts”!
95. Why did the opossum become a tour guide? Because it could “show” people around without “playing dead”!
96. What’s an opossum’s favorite fashion statement? “Possum-chic”!
97. Why did the opossum apply for a job as a scientist? Because it could “experiment” without “playing dead”!
98. What’s an opossum’s favorite planet in the solar system? “Possum-ter”!
99. Why did the opossum become a motivational coach? Because it could help you “play alive” and reach your goals!
100. What’s an opossum’s favorite job at the amusement park? Running the “Possum Coaster”!
101. Why did the opossum apply for a job at the bakery? Because it wanted to “roll” in the dough without “playing dead”!
102. What’s an opossum’s favorite dinosaur? The “Possumus Rex”!
103. Why did the opossum become a pilot? Because it knew how to “take flight” without “playing dead”!
104. What’s an opossum’s favorite card game? “Possuminoes”!
105. Why did the opossum become a gardener? Because it had a green “possum” thumb without “playing dead”!
106. What’s an opossum’s favorite place to vacation? “Possum Beach”!
107. Why did the opossum become a chef? Because it could whip up a “dead”licious meal without “playing dead”!
108. What’s an opossum’s favorite food truck? “Possum-on-the-Go”!
109. Why did the opossum apply for a job as a firefighter? Because it could “extinguish” fires without “playing dead”!
110. What’s an opossum’s favorite hobby on the weekend? “Possuming” around town!
111. Why did the opossum become a DJ? Because it could “spin” tunes without “playing dead”!
112. What’s an opossum’s favorite board game to host? “Possumopoly”!
113. Why did the opossum become a lifecoach? Because it could help you overcome any obstacle without “playing dead”!
114. What’s an opossum’s favorite winter activity? “Possumbogganing”!
115. Why did the opossum become a magician? Because it could make things disappear without “playing dead”!

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Hilarious Opossum Jokes:

116. What’s an opossum’s favorite beach game? “Possumball”!
117. Why did the opossum apply for a job at the circus? Because it could juggle without “playing dead”!
118. What’s an opossum’s favorite fairy tale? “Sleeping Possum”!
119. Why did the opossum become an archaeologist? Because it could uncover history without “playing dead”!
120. What’s an opossum’s favorite mode of transportation? The “Possumobile”!
121. Why did the opossum become a motivational speaker? Because it could inspire others to stop “playing dead” and start living life to the fullest!
122. What’s an opossum’s favorite space exploration mission? “Possum 1”
123. Why did the opossum become a judge? Because it could give verdicts without “playing dead” in court!
124. What’s an opossum’s favorite clothing brand? “Possum Couture”!
125. Why did the opossum become a racecar driver? Because it could handle high speeds without “playing dead”!
126. What’s an opossum’s favorite pastime at the beach? “Possumsandcastle” building!
127. Why did the opossum become a teacher? Because it could educate without “playing dead” in class!
128. What’s an opossum’s favorite mode of communication? “Possum-tcards”!
129. Why did the opossum become a painter? Because it could create masterpieces without “playing dead”!
130. What’s an opossum’s favorite planetarium show? “Possumtellarium”!
131. Why did the opossum become a therapist? Because it could listen without “playing dead” in sessions!
132. What’s an opossum’s favorite way to relax? “Possummassage”!
133. Why did the opossum become a tour guide? Because it could show people around without “playing dead”!
134. What’s an opossum’s favorite superhero team? The “Possum League”!
135. Why did the opossum become a banker? Because it could manage finances without “playing dead”!
136. What’s an opossum’s favorite song to dance to? “Possum Shake”!
137. Why did the opossum become a detective? Because it could solve mysteries without “playing dead”!
138. What’s an opossum’s favorite ice cream topping? “Possumberries”!
139. Why did the opossum become a travel blogger? Because it could explore the world without “playing dead”!
140. What’s an opossum’s favorite gardening tool? The “Possumhoe”!
141. Why did the opossum become a lifeguard at the pool? Because it could watch over swimmers without “playing dead”!
142. What’s an opossum’s favorite magic trick? Making treats “possum-pear” out of thin air!
143. Why did the opossum become a pilot? Because it could navigate the skies without “playing dead”!
144. What’s an opossum’s favorite science experiment? “Possumology”!
145. Why did the opossum become a stand-up comedian? Because it could make audiences laugh without “playing dead”!
146. What’s an opossum’s favorite winter sport? “Possumboarding”!
147. Why did the opossum become a zookeeper? Because it could care for animals without “playing dead”!
148. What’s an opossum’s favorite superhero costume? “Possumsuit”!
149. Why did the opossum become a firefighter? Because it could put out fires without “playing dead”!
150. What’s an opossum’s favorite musical instrument? The “Possumbong”!
151. Why did the opossum become a chef? Because it could create culinary delights without “playing dead”!
152. What’s an opossum’s favorite board game to win? “Possumination”!
153. Why did the opossum become a motivational speaker? Because it could inspire without “playing dead”!
154. What’s an opossum’s favorite ocean adventure? “Possumdiving”!
155. Why did the opossum become an inventor? Because it could create gadgets without “playing dead”!
156. What’s an opossum’s favorite theater production? “The Phantom of the Possum”!
157. Why did the opossum become a photographer? Because it could capture moments without “playing dead”!
158. What’s an opossum’s favorite type of art to create? “Possumpressionism”!
159. Why did the opossum become a scientist? Because it could conduct experiments without “playing dead”!
160. What’s an opossum’s favorite word game? “Possumigrams”!

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Conclusion:

Opossums might be known for their clever “playing possum” act, but they’re also a source of endless amusement in the world of jokes.

We hope this collection of over 150+ opossum-inspired one-liners brought a smile to your face and brightened your day.

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