Chuckles and Tears: A Collection of 145+ Jokes About Crying

Introduction

Laughter is the best medicine, they say, and sometimes that includes finding humor in life’s more emotional moments. In this light-hearted compilation, we present a range of jokes centered around the theme of crying. 

Whether you’re wiping away tears of laughter or chuckling through watery eyes, these jokes are here to brighten your day.

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Jokes About Crying

1. Why did the tissue go to therapy? It had too many issues!
2. I’m not crying, I’m just watering my cheeks.
3. What do you call a bunch of crying musical notes? A symphony of tears!
4. Crying over spilled milk? At least it’s lactose intolerant.
5. Why did the scarecrow break down in tears? Because it had no guts.
6. My pillow has seen more tears than a therapist.
7. Why did the computer cry? It had too many bytes of emotion.
8. I told my computer I needed a break, and it started showing me crying ads.
9. What do you call a sad cup of coffee? Depresso.
10. My bank account looked at me and started sobbing.
11. Why was the math book crying? It had too many problems.
12. I asked my smartphone if it’s okay, and Siri shed a virtual tear.
13. Why do onions always make you cry? Because they know all the tear-able jokes.
14. I told a joke about tears, but it was a tearable punchline.
15. What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs while crying? A condescending con descending condescendingly.
16. My dog cried during a movie, but I had to paws the film to comfort him.
17. Why was the ocean crying? Because it had too many depths to its emotions.
18. Emotionally invested in my snacks, I cried when my chips broke.
19. What did the painting say to the artist? I’m frame for tears!
20. I tried to make a pun about tears, but it was just too eye-ronic.
21. Why did the tomato turn red and cry? It saw the salad dressing!
22. If crying over spilled milk is a thing, what about spilled water?
23. Why did the calendar cry? Its days were numbered.
24. I told my phone a joke, and it burst into tears of laughter…or maybe it just fell into the sink.
25. What do you call a sad cup of tea? Reality.
26. I saw a pencil crying; it had too many points to make.
27. Why did the bicycle shed a tear? It lost its balance.
28. I made a joke about tears, but it was tearrible.
29. What do you call a sad cupcake? A soggy bottom.
30. If laughter is the best medicine, are tearful giggles the second best?
31. Why did the tomato turn red and cry even harder? It caught its reflection in the mirror.
32. My friend tried to make me cry, but I laughed so hard, tears rolled down my cheeks anyway.
33. What do you call a weeping can? A can-dolier.
34. My calculator started sobbing uncontrollably; I think it finally realized its limitations.
35. Why was the math book having a meltdown? It couldn’t solve its emotional equations.
36. I wanted to tell a joke about tissues, but I didn’t want to tear it up.
37. What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
38. My tear ducts are like a water fountain that only works when I’m cutting onions.
39. Why did the umbrella cry during the storm? It couldn’t keep it together.
40. I asked my computer if it’s feeling emotional, and it replied, “I’m experiencing a data leak.”
41. What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry.
42. My cat started crying when it realized the laser pointer wasn’t real prey.

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One-Liners About Crying

43. Why did the clown cry at the party? He thought everyone was just clowning around.
44. I tried to tell a joke about tears, but I couldn’t get it out without choking up.
45. What do you call a potato that cries a lot? A weepy spud.
46. My couch was so sad, it started shedding upholstery tears.
47. Why did the book break down in tears? Its plot was just too emotional.
48. I told my alarm clock I wanted to sleep in, and it burst into tears of disappointment.
49. What’s a teardrop’s favorite game? Squash.
50. My GPS started crying when I missed a turn; I guess it’s really directionally challenged.
51. Why did the refrigerator cry? Because it got caught in a cold war with the freezer.
52. I tried to make a joke about tears, but I couldn’t see it through my watery eyes.
53. What do you call a tree that cries a lot? A weeping willow, of course!
54. My soap dispenser cried when it realized I preferred the bar kind.
55. Why did the phone start weeping? It overheard me talking about upgrading.
56. I asked the rain why it was crying, and it said it had too many clouded thoughts.
57. What’s a raindrop’s favorite type of music? Pop!
58. My computer cried when it heard me talking about a potential upgrade.
59. Why did the belt start crying? It felt held back.
60. I saw a doormat crying, but I guess it felt stepped on.
61. What do you call a sad insect? A cry-ant.
62. My microwave started crying when I told it I preferred leftovers.
63. Why did the bicycle cry when it got a flat tire? It was tired of being deflated.
64. I told my shoes a tearful secret, but they’re sole-mates, so they understood.
65. What do you call a happy onion? A jolly-cumber.
66. My clock cried when I hung up the picture of my smartphone.
67. Why did the snowman start melting and crying? He heard the weather forecast.
68. I told a joke about tears, but it rained on the punchline.
69. What do you call a sad cheese? Blue cheese.
70. My bookshelf started crying because it was overwhelmed with stories.
71. Why did the pencil sharpener shed a tear? It felt pointless.
72. I made a joke about tears, but it was too much of an emotional roller coaster.
73. What do you call a sad rabbit? A tearabbit.
74. My shoes cried when I stepped on a puddle; they’re a bit sensitive.
75. Why did the road start weeping? It had too many traffic problems.
76. I told a joke about crying, but it was so sad that even my tears cried.
77. What do you call a sobbing lemon? A crytrus.
78. My fridge cried when I forgot to close its door; it’s a real cold shoulder.
79. Why did the computer screen start crying? It couldn’t display its feelings.
80. I asked my car why it was crying, and it said it’s tired of always being fueled by emotions.
81. What do you call a sad owl? A fowl mood.
82. My TV started crying when I turned off the binge-watching session.
83. Why did the lamp start shedding tears? It felt overshadowed.
84. I tried to tell a tearful joke, but I was too choked up to speak.
85. What do you call a crying candle? A melting moment.
86. My doorbell cried when it realized it’s only wanted for the noise.
87. Why did the broom break down in tears? It was tired of being pushed around.
88. I told a joke about tears, but it fell flat like a tear drop.

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Best Puns About Crying

89. What do you call a tearful cake? A sobert.
90. My garden hose started crying when it heard I was using sprinklers.
91. Why did the toilet start crying? It’s been dealing with a lot of crap.
92. I asked my watch if it’s time to stop crying, and it replied, “Give it a sec.”
93. What do you call a sad pillow? A tearrest.
94. My mirror cried when it saw its own reflection; I guess it’s a bit emotional.
95. Why did the window start crying? It felt paneful.
96. I told a joke about tears, but it didn’t have a clear ending.
97. What do you call a sad mountain? A hill of sorrow.
98. My couch cried when I rearranged the living room; it’s feeling a bit left out.
99. Why did the wall start crying? It felt plastered with emotions.
100. I asked my shoes why they were so sad, and they said they were just sole-searching.
101. What do you call a crying lake? A tear-rific scene.
102. My dishwasher started crying when I told it I’m washing dishes by hand.
103. Why did the tree start shedding tears? It was rooted in sadness.
104. I tried to make a joke about tears, but it didn’t water my eyes.
105. What do you call a tearful clock? A weep-timer.
106. My vacuum cleaner cried when it realized it sucks at life.
107. Why did the fridge start crying on Valentine’s Day? It was feeling freezer-burned.
108. I told a joke about crying, but it was so punny that it made me weep.
109. What do you call a sad pirate? A teary-ate.
110. My stapler cried when it saw me using paperclips; it felt a bit attached.
111. Why did the remote control cry? It couldn’t find its button to happiness.
112. I asked my plant why it was crying, and it said it’s leafing a bit emotional.
113. What do you call a sobbing spider? A cry-arachnid.
114. My mailbox cried when it realized all the mail is digital now.
115. Why did the fence start weeping? It felt fenced in by its emotions.
116. I tried to tell a tearful joke, but it was too emotional to deliver.
117. What do you call a sad volcano? Lava tears.
118. My backpack started crying when I unloaded all my textbooks.
119. Why did the computer mouse cry? It felt clicked off.
120. I told a joke about tears, but it was so corny that even the vegetables cried.
121. Why did the kleenex need therapy? It had too many issues to tissue out.
122. My keyboard started crying when I told it I’m switching to voice recognition.
123. What do you call a sad calendar? A tear-rific planner.
124. My blender cried when I told it I’m on a smoothie cleanse.
125. Why did the hat start weeping? It felt capped by its emotions.
126. I tried to tell a joke about tears, but I got too teary-eyed to finish.
127. What do you call a sorrowful light bulb? A gluminary.
128. My pen cried when it realized it’s been replaced by digital signatures.
129. Why did the toothbrush cry? It felt brushed aside.
130. I asked my backpack why it was so sad, and it said it’s carrying too much emotional baggage.
131. What do you call a weepy pastry? A pie-cry.
132. My blender cried when it heard I was making frozen drinks without it.
133. Why did the mirror start crying at the beauty pageant? It couldn’t reflect the winner.
134. I told a joke about tears, but it was a bit too salty.
135. What do you call a sad calculator? A blue-tooth.
136. My closet cried when I cleaned it out; it had too many fashion regrets.
137. Why did the backpack cry at the end of the school year? It missed its books.
138. I asked my shoes if they were alright, and they replied, “We’re just feeling a little tongue-tied.”
139. What do you call a sorrowful DJ? A disc-jockey.
140. My watch cried when I told it I’m switching to a smartwatch.
141. Why did the envelope start crying? It got sealed with a kiss goodbye.
142. I tried to make a joke about tears, but it got washed away.
143. What do you call a crying cookie? A tea-rable treat.
144. My coat cried when I told it summer was coming; it’s not ready to be put away.
145. Why did the printer start shedding tears? It couldn’t handle the paper trail of its emotions.
146. I asked my car why it was crying, and it said it just hit an emotional speed bump.
147. What do you call a sad laundry basket? A tear basket.
148. My flashlight cried when I told it I’m using the flashlight app instead.
149. Why did the calculator cry during the math test? It forgot its solutions.
150. I tried to tell a joke about tears, but it was too emotional for the punny punchline.

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Conclusion

Laughter and tears are two sides of the same emotional coin. These jokes remind us that even in the midst of our tears, finding a reason to smile can bring comfort and joy. 

So, the next time you feel the waterworks coming, just remember that a good laugh can turn your tears into a brighter moment.

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