Laugh Out Loud with Hilarious 70+ Flat Earther Jokes

Introduction

Are you ready to indulge in a bit of light-hearted humor? We’ve curated a selection of 70+ flat earther jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone. These jokes playfully poke fun at the unique beliefs of flat earthers and will have you laughing out loud. 

So, sit back, relax, and enjoy a good dose of comedic relief!

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Flat Earther Comedy Zone

1. Why did the flat-earther bring a ladder to the bar? To prove that even the horizon couldn’t limit their drink choices.
2. How do flat-earthers apologize? They say, “I’m sorry, my perspective was a bit warped.”
3. Why don’t flat-earthers play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when everyone can see you from all angles!
4. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite type of humor? Dry humor, just like their view of the globe.
5. How did the flat-earther explain circumnavigation? “It’s simple, you just keep turning left.”
6. Why did the flat-earther start a gardening club? They wanted to prove that plants grow straight up, no matter where you are on the “disc.”
7. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite song? “Don’t Stop Believin'” by Journey, because they never do.
8. Why did the flat-earther get kicked out of the art class? They kept drawing maps that looked more like pancakes.
9. How do flat-earthers do math? With a lot of creative angles.
10. Why don’t flat-earthers get lost? They always have a one-dimensional GPS system.
11. What did the flat-earther say to the pilot? “Can you keep it steady? I’m trying to take a level-headed selfie.”
12. Why did the flat-earther refuse to use elevators? They didn’t want to be transported to the “other side.”
13. How do you annoy a flat-earther? Offer them a globe as a gift.
14. Why did the flat-earther go to school? To unlearn everything about geography.
15. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite video game? “FlatOut,” of course.
16. Why don’t flat-earthers trust stairs? They’re always up to something.
17. What did one flat-earther say to the other at the beach? “I think our perspective is a bit skewed here.”
18. Why did the flat-earther become an engineer? They wanted to design bridges that followed their “logic.”
19. What do you call a group of flat-earthers? A pancake stack.

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Jokes for Flat Earther Folks

20. Why did the flat-earther start a baking show? To prove that even cookies are flatter than the Earth.
21. How do flat-earthers make scrambled eggs? By whisking them in a straight line.
22. Why did the flat-earther become a gardener? They loved working on a level playing field.
23. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite dance move? The “Two-Step Proof.”
24. Why don’t flat-earthers need glasses? They believe their vision is already 20/20… and flat.
25. Why did the flat-earther go to the therapist? They needed help dealing with their distorted worldview.
26. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite ice cream flavor? Plain.
27. Why did the flat-earther start a construction company? To build a world that suited their beliefs.
28. How does a flat-earther apologize for being late? They blame it on the curvature of their watch.
29. Why don’t flat-earthers use maps? Because every map is just a conspiracy.
30. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite toy? A yo-yo, because it always comes back to them.
31. Why did the flat-earther go to the beach with a shovel? To dig until they reached the bottom of the ocean… or the edge.
32. How do flat-earthers go camping? They pitch their tents on the “disc’s” surface.
33. What did the flat-earther say when they saw a rainbow? “Proof that even light bends to our beliefs!”
34. Why did the flat-earther start a music band? To drop some “flat” beats.
35. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite shape? A straight line.
36. Why did the flat-earther go to the doctor? They felt a bit “unbalanced.”
37. How do flat-earthers take measurements? Carefully, so they don’t accidentally discover the truth.
38. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite book genre? Fantasy, as long as it doesn’t involve globes.

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Flat Earther One-Liners

39. Why did the flat-earther start a restaurant? To serve “world-class” flatbreads.
40. How do flat-earthers solve puzzles? By fitting square pegs into round holes.
41. What did the flat-earther say about gravity? “It’s just a theory… like the globe!”
42. Why did the flat-earther start a tech company? They wanted to create devices with “level-headed” user interfaces.
43. How do flat-earthers shop for clothes? They stick to items that offer a “flattering” fit.
44. Why did the flat-earther become a tailor? They loved working with fabric that had no curves.
45. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite exercise? Push-ups, because they only involve moving in one direction.
46. Why did the flat-earther start a YouTube channel? To “flatten” out all the misinformation.
47. How do flat-earthers navigate through forests? They follow the straightest path, no matter what’s in the way.
48. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite board game? Monopoly, because they can buy up all the properties and still not go around the world.
49. Why did the flat-earther become a painter? They wanted to create landscapes that fit their perspective.
50. How do flat-earthers run for exercise? In a straight line until they run out of “disc.”
51. What did the flat-earther say about space travel? “I’ll believe it when I can see the edge from the window.”
52. Why did the flat-earther become a tailor? They wanted to straighten out the fashion industry.
53. How do flat-earthers use computers? They prefer flat screens and avoid “round” programs.
54. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite shape of pasta? Fettuccine, the flatter, the better!
55. Why did the flat-earther start a podcast? To broadcast their ideas to a “disc”-erning audience.
56. How do flat-earthers go fishing? They cast their lines and wait for the fish to swim straight to them.
57. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite movie genre? Science fiction, because it’s far from their reality.

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Flat Earther Jokes Edition

58. Why did the flat-earther become a fashion model? They knew they’d look good from every angle.
59. How do flat-earthers travel? They take straight-line routes to their destinations.
60. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite time of day? High noon, when there are no shadows to spoil their view.
61. Why did the flat-earther become a photographer? They loved capturing the “flattest” landscapes.
62. How do flat-earthers throw a party? They invite guests from all “edges” of the world.
63. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite type of architecture? Flatiron buildings, naturally.
64. Why did the flat-earther start a gardening show? To teach viewers how to grow plants without any curvature.
65. How do flat-earthers use social media? They post updates that only cover a limited perspective.
66. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite type of dessert? Anything with a flat crust.
67. Why did the flat-earther start a comedy club? To show that humor, like the Earth, is flat.
68. How do flat-earthers play soccer? They kick the ball straight ahead, no matter where the goal is.
69. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite exercise equipment? The treadmill, because it keeps them moving in a straight line.
70. Why did the flat-earther become a chef? To create dishes that are as flat as their worldview.
71. How do flat-earthers use telescopes? They only look in one direction, just like their belief.
72. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite type of dance? The line dances, naturally.
73. Why did the flat-earther start a travel blog? To document their adventures along the “disc.”
74. How do flat-earthers do karaoke? They sing songs with a limited vocal range.
75. What’s a flat-earther’s favorite hairstyle? Straight and level, just like the Earth.
76. Why did the flat-earther become a tailor? They wanted to make sure their clothes were never “out of shape.”

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Conclusion

Laughter is a universal language that brings people together. We hope these flat earther jokes brought a smile to your face and brightened your day. 

Remember, these jokes are all in good fun and meant to spread joy. Share a laugh with your friends and keep the positive vibes rolling!

FAQs