Wedding Wonders: 163+ One-Liners for a Memorable Speech

Introduction

Weddings are joyous occasions, and what better way to celebrate love than with laughter? If you’re tasked with giving a speech, we’ve got you covered! 

Dive into our treasure trove of funny one liners to add a touch of humor to your wedding speech and leave the audience in stitches.

Read More: Jokes About Wedding Officiants

Funny Wedding Speech Jokes

  1. Why do married people live longer? Because they can’t argue with their spouse if they’re dead!
  2. What’s the secret to a happy marriage? A sense of humor, and a short memory!
  3. Why did the bride suggest they elope? She wanted a marriage without any strings attached!
  4. What’s the difference between a husband and a zombie? Zombies only have eyes for one thing!
  5. Why did the groom bring a ladder to the wedding? To take their relationship to the next level!
  6. What do you call two birds in love? Tweet-hearts!
  7. Why did the best man bring a notebook to the wedding? To ‘note’ down any objections!
  8. What’s a bride’s favorite drink? Mar-tea-ni!
  9. Why do brides wear veils? Because good things come to those who veil!
  10. Why did the bride and groom go to the gym before the wedding? For the “wedding weights” program!
  11. What’s a groom’s favorite kind of sandwich? A wedding one!
  12. Why did the bride ask for a refund on her wedding dress? It was a tearable purchase!
  13. What’s a bridesmaid’s favorite type of humor? Maid-of-honor!
  14. Why do married people always seem so calm? Because they’ve been through the wedding day storm!
  15. Why did the wedding cake go to therapy? It had too many layers of issues!
  16. What do you call a couple who marry in November? Newlyweds!
  17. Why did the groom bring a map to the wedding? In case he lost his bearings!
  18. What’s a bride’s favorite type of math? Add-miration!
  19. Why did the bride and groom go to the bank on their wedding day? To get a joint account!
  20. What’s a groom’s favorite movie genre? Wedding suspense!
  21. Why did the bride bring a ladder to the wedding? To elevate the ceremony!
  22. What’s a bride’s favorite flower? A bridal bouquet!
  23. Why did the groom bring a calculator to the wedding? To calculate the cost of love!
  24. What did the groom say to the wedding cake? “You take the cake!”
  25. Why did the bride and groom go to the comedy club before the wedding? To tie the knot in laughter!
  26. Why did the bride and groom hire a gardener for the wedding? To add a touch of “wedding greenery”!
  27. What did the groom say to the wedding photographer? “I hope you’re ready to capture my good side, it’s the one facing the bride!”
  28. Why did the bride bring a pencil to the wedding? To draw a conclusion to her single life!
  29. What’s a groom’s favorite type of weather? Wed-ther!
  30. Why did the bride invite her computer to the wedding? She wanted a byte of happiness!
  31. What did the groom say to the wedding cake decorator? “You really take the cake!”
  32. Why did the bride and groom decide to marry on a mountain? Because they wanted a peak experience!
  33. What did the bride say to the groom before the wedding? “Let’s make beautiful memories—and maybe some babies too!”
  34. Why did the best man bring a parachute to the wedding? In case love made him fall!
  35. What’s a bride’s favorite game? Bridal bingo!
  36. Why did the bride bring a mirror to the wedding? To reflect on her happiness!
  37. What did the groom say when he saw his bride walking down the aisle? “I’m aisle yours!”
  38. Why did the bride and groom choose a garden wedding? Because they wanted to plant the seeds of love!
  39. What’s a groom’s favorite type of music? Wedding bells!
  40. Why did the bride wear sunglasses at the wedding? To shield herself from the groom’s radiant love!
  41. What did the best man say to the groom during the toast? “May your love be as endless as my speech!”
  42. Why did the bride bring a magnifying glass to the wedding? To closely examine her groom’s commitment!
  43. What’s a bride’s favorite type of seafood? Bride lobster!
  44. Why did the groom bring a fishing rod to the wedding? To reel in a lifetime of happiness!
  45. What did the bride say to the groom after the ceremony? “Let the adventure begin!”

Read More: Jokes About Wedding Dad

Wedding Speech One-Liners

  1. Why did the bride and groom choose an oceanfront wedding? They wanted waves of love!
  2. What’s a groom’s favorite exercise at the gym? Wedding curls!
  3. Why did the bride bring a calendar to the wedding? To mark the day as the beginning of forever!
  4. What did the groom say to the wedding DJ? “Spin some tunes and let’s dance into marital bliss!”
  5. Why did the bride and groom decide to get married during a thunderstorm? They wanted their love to strike like lightning!
  6. What did the groom say when he forgot the wedding rings? “I guess I’ll have to put a ring on it twice!”
  7. Why did the bride bring a GPS to the wedding? To ensure love takes the right direction!
  8. What’s a groom’s favorite dance move? The “wedding shuffle”!
  9. Why did the best man bring a ladder to the wedding? To give the groom a leg up in married life!
  10. What did the bride say to the groom about his love for football? “I hope you tackle marriage with the same enthusiasm as a quarterback!”
  11. Why did the bride bring a map to the wedding? In case she got cold feet!
  12. What’s a groom’s favorite type of coffee? Wedding espresso!
  13. Why did the bride and groom hire a comedian for the wedding? To ensure there were no cold feet—only warm laughs!
  14. What did the bride say to the groom before cutting the cake? “Let’s slice into our sweet future together!”
  15. Why did the groom bring a telescope to the wedding? To get a closer look at love’s celestial wonders!
  16. What’s a bride’s favorite type of literature? Wedding novels!
  17. Why did the best man bring a hammer to the wedding? In case the groom got cold feet, he could nail them down!
  18. What did the bride say to the groom about their love story? “Our romance is the greatest plot twist!”
  19. Why did the groom bring a camera crew to the wedding? To capture the “reel” love story!
  20. What’s a groom’s favorite type of dessert? Wedding cake, of course!
  21. Why did the bride bring a dictionary to the wedding? To define their happily ever after!
  22. What did the groom say to the wedding planner? “You’ve got the key to our perfect day!”
  23. Why did the bride and groom choose a winter wedding? They wanted to frost their love with snowflakes!
  24. What’s a bride’s favorite type of cookie? Bridal biscuit!
  25. Why did the groom bring a stopwatch to the wedding? To ensure every moment was a perfect “match”!
  26. What did the bride say to the groom about his cooking skills? “I hope our marriage isn’t as rare as your steaks!”
  27. Why did the best man bring a suitcase to the wedding? To pack away any doubts about the couple’s love!
  28. What’s a groom’s favorite type of footwear? Wedding loafers!
  29. Why did the bride bring a compass to the wedding? To navigate the twists and turns of married life!
  30. What did the groom say to the wedding DJ about the playlist? “Let’s make sure it’s a harmonious start to our forever!”
  31. What did the groom say to the wedding florist? “Bloom us away with the perfect arrangement!”
  32. Why did the bride bring a fortune teller to the wedding? To predict a future full of love and laughter!
  33. What’s a groom’s favorite type of car? Wedding convertible!
  34. Why did the best man bring a deck of cards to the wedding? In case he needed to deal with any pre-wedding jitters!
  35. What did the bride say to the groom about his love for gardening? “I hope our love blossoms like your favorite flowers!”
  36. Why did the bride bring a rainbow to the wedding? To add a colorful start to their journey as a married couple!
  37. What’s a groom’s favorite type of bird? Wedding dove!
  38. Why did the bride and groom hire a magician for the wedding? To make any wedding day stress disappear like magic!
  39. What did the groom say to the wedding chef? “Spice up our marriage with a dash of love!”
  40. Why did the bride bring a telescope to the wedding? To keep an eye on the stars in her groom’s eyes!
  41. What’s a bride’s favorite type of weather on her wedding day? Weddingsunshine!
  42. Why did the best man bring a tape measure to the wedding? To make sure the love story measures up!
  43. What did the bride say to the groom about his fashion sense? “I hope our marriage is as timeless as your style!”
  44. Why did the groom bring a thesaurus to the wedding? To find the perfect words for their vows!
  45. What’s a groom’s favorite type of music at the wedding? Wedding jazz!

Read More: Jokes About Father Of The Bride

Humorous Wedding Speech Jokes

  1. Why did the bride bring a compass to the wedding? To navigate through the adventure of married life!
  2. What did the groom say to the wedding planner about the budget? “Let’s make our love the richest part of the day!”
  3. Why did the bride and groom choose a beach wedding? They wanted their love to have waves of happiness!
  4. What’s a bride’s favorite type of ice cream? Bridalberry!
  5. Why did the groom bring a timer to the wedding? To make sure every moment was worth remembering!
  6. What did the bride say to the groom about his love for fishing? “I hope our marriage is a catch!”
  7. Why did the best man bring a suitcase to the wedding? To pack away any worries about the big day!
  8. What’s a groom’s favorite type of cake? Wedding cheesecake!
  9. Why did the bride bring a telescope to the wedding? To get a closer look at their bright future!
  10. What did the groom say to the wedding DJ about the playlist? “Let’s spin the soundtrack of our love story!”
  11. What did the groom say to the wedding planner about the seating chart? “Let’s make sure love is in the right seat!”
  12. Why did the bride bring a map to the wedding? To navigate the path of eternal love!
  13. What’s a groom’s favorite kind of sandwich at the wedding? The wed-deli!
  14. Why did the best man bring a dictionary to the wedding? To define the couple’s love story!
  15. What did the bride say to the groom about his love for technology? “I hope our marriage has a strong Wi-Fi connection!”
  16. Why did the groom bring a magnifying glass to the wedding? To magnify the happiness of the day!
  17. What’s a bride’s favorite type of fruit at the wedding? Wedding melon!
  18. Why did the bride and groom choose a rooftop wedding? To elevate their love to new heights!
  19. What did the groom say to the wedding DJ about the playlist? “Let’s hit all the right notes in our love story!”
  20. Why did the bride bring a puzzle to the wedding? To symbolize the pieces of their perfect union!
  21. What’s a groom’s favorite type of book at the wedding? Wedding novel!
  22. Why did the best man bring a thermometer to the wedding? To make sure the love was heating up!
  23. What did the bride say to the groom about his cooking skills? “I hope our marriage is as well-seasoned as your dishes!”
  24. Why did the groom bring a compass to the wedding? To navigate the journey of marriage with precision!
  25. What’s a bride’s favorite type of jewelry at the wedding? Bridal pearls!
  26. Why did the bride and groom hire a comedian for the wedding? To ensure laughter echoed through the celebration!
  27. What did the groom say to the wedding photographer about retouching? “Capture our love, but no need for Photoshop!”
  28. Why did the bride bring a stopwatch to the wedding? To savor every moment of their special day!
  29. What’s a groom’s favorite type of footwear at the wedding? Wedding sneakers!
  30. Why did the best man bring a telescope to the wedding? To see the stars align for the couple!
  31. What did the bride say to the groom about his gardening skills? “May our love bloom like your favorite flowers!”
  32. Why did the groom bring a map to the wedding? To find his way to the heart of marital bliss!
  33. What’s a bride’s favorite type of weather on her wedding day? Weddingsnow!
  34. Why did the bride and groom choose a destination wedding? Because love knows no borders!
  35. What did the groom say to the wedding cake decorator? “You’re icing on the cake of our perfect day!”
  36. What did the groom say when he forgot the wedding vows? “I guess I’ll have to wing it like our love!”
  37. Why did the bride bring a telescope to the wedding? To see a future full of endless stars with her groom!
  38. What’s a groom’s favorite type of joke at the wedding? Wedding puns!
  39. Why did the best man bring a book to the wedding? To bookmark the couple’s special day!
  40. What did the bride say to the groom about his love for pets? “I hope our marriage is as ‘purr’-fect as your favorite cat!”
  41. Why did the groom bring a calculator to the wedding? To tally up the love equation!
  42. What’s a bride’s favorite type of drink at the wedding? Wedding spritz!
  43. Why did the bride and groom hire a poet for the wedding? To turn their love story into beautiful verses!
  44. What did the groom say to the wedding planner about the theme? “Let’s make our wedding the ‘happily ever after’ kind!”
  45. Why did the bride bring a compass to the wedding? To make sure they never lose their way in love!

Read More: Jokes About Wedding Anniversary

Hilarious Wedding Speech Jokes

  1. What’s a groom’s favorite type of dessert at the wedding? Wedding pudding!
  2. Why did the best man bring a map to the wedding? To chart a course for the couple’s lifelong journey!
  3. What did the bride say to the groom about his fashion choices? “May our marriage be as stylish as your wardrobe!”
  4. Why did the groom bring a tape measure to the wedding? To measure the length of their love!
  5. What’s a bride’s favorite type of music at the wedding? Wedding symphony!
  6. Why did the bride bring a compass to the wedding? To ensure their love always points true north!
  7. What did the groom say to the wedding planner about the guest list? “Let’s make it a celebration to remember!”
  8. Why did the bride and groom choose a garden wedding? To plant the seeds of love for a lifetime!
  9. What’s a groom’s favorite type of fruit at the wedding? Wedding berries!
  10. Why did the best man bring a suitcase to the wedding? To pack away memories of a perfect day!
  11. What did the bride say to the groom about his love for hiking? “I hope our marriage is an uphill climb to happiness!”
  12. Why did the groom bring a dictionary to the wedding? To define the language of love they’ll share!
  13. What’s a bride’s favorite type of jewelry at the wedding? Bridal diamonds!
  14. Why did the bride bring a telescope to the wedding? To gaze into the stars of their shared future!
  15. What did the groom say to the wedding DJ about the playlist? “Let’s make it a mixtape of our love story!”
  16. What did the bride say to the groom when he asked about wedding expenses? “Don’t worry, dear, love doesn’t cost a thing—everything else does!”
  17. Why did the groom bring a ladder to the wedding reception? To raise a toast to the happy couple!
  18. What’s a bride’s favorite type of weather after the wedding? Weddingsunshine, of course!
  19. Why did the best man bring a mirror to the wedding? To reflect on the beauty of true love!
  20. What did the bride say to the groom about his dancing skills? “I hope our marriage is as smooth as your moves on the dance floor!”
  21. Why did the groom bring a microscope to the wedding? To magnify the small moments of joy!
  22. What’s a groom’s favorite type of movie at the wedding? Wedding romance!
  23. Why did the bride and groom choose a winter wedding? Because they wanted their love to be as enduring as the snow!
  24. What did the groom say to the wedding photographer about candid shots? “Capture our spontaneous joy, but make sure we look good!”
  25. Why did the bride bring a dictionary to the wedding? To define their love story with the most beautiful words!
  26. What did the groom say when asked about his pre-wedding nerves? “I’m not nervous; I just have wedding butterflies doing gymnastics in my stomach!”
  27. Why did the bride bring a clock to the wedding? To remind everyone that it’s always the right time for love!
  28. What’s a groom’s favorite type of cookie at the wedding? Wedding fortune cookies!
  29. Why did the best man bring a camera to the wedding? To capture the picture-perfect memories of the day!
  30. What did the bride say to the groom when he forgot his vows? “Don’t worry; we’ll just consider it a rehearsal for our lifelong commitment!”

Read More:

Jokes About Father Groom Speech

Jokes About Bride’s Father Speech

Conclusion

With these one liners in your arsenal, your wedding speech is sure to be a hit! Laughter is a universal language, and sharing a moment of joy with the happy couple will make the celebration even more special.

FAQs

Can I use these jokes in any wedding speech?

Absolutely! These one liners are designed to add humor to any wedding speech.

Are these jokes suitable for all ages?

Yes, these one liners are family-friendly and appropriate for diverse audiences.

How can I incorporate these one liners seamlessly into my speech?

Choose the jokes that resonate with you and the couple, and practice delivery for maximum impact.

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