142+ Sailor Jokes - Hilarious Sea-themed Humor For All Ages

Introduction

Ahoy, matey! Are you ready to set sail on a sea of laughter? Welcome to our treasure trove of sailor jokes that will have you rolling with waves of amusement. Whether you’re a seasoned sailor or a landlubber, these nautical puns and humorous tales are sure to tickle your funny bone.

Join us as we navigate the depths of humor on the high seas. Anchors away to fun and hilarity!

Read more: Jokes About Captains

Sailor Humor

Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the ship? Because he wanted to go to the next level of sailing!
What do you call a sailor who can play the piano? A yacht-tickling musician!
Why did the sailor always carry a pencil and paper? In case he had to draw his weapon!
How do sailors prefer to communicate at sea? Using sail-phones!
What do you call a sailor who tells jokes? A pun-tomime artist!
Why did the sailor take a broom to the beach? Because he wanted to sweep the sea!
What’s a sailor’s favorite kind of music? Rock ‘n’ roll, of course!
How do sailors apologize? They say, “I’m shore-ry!”
Why do sailors make terrible baseball players? Because they’re always hitting foul balls!
What do you call a sailor who’s good with knots? A mariner!
Why did the sailor go to the doctor? Because he was feeling a little “seasick”!
What did the sailor say to the computer? “Aye aye, captain!”
What do you get when you cross a sailor with a pirate? A crew-matey!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house!
How do sailors party? They throw anchor-chiefs!
What’s a sailor’s favorite game? Battleship!
Why did the sailor go broke? He lost all his buoys!
What do sailors use to blow their noses? Anchor-chiefs!
Why did the sailor take a bar of soap to the beach? He wanted to catch some waves!
How do sailors apologize to each other? They say, “I’m shore-ry” and “Water under the bridge”!
What’s a sailor’s favorite vegetable? Leeks!
What did the sailor say when he got lost at sea? “I’m all at sea!”
What do you call a sailor who’s also a musician? A rockstarboard!
Why do sailors make great basketball players? Because they’re good at shooting hoops!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of movie? Anything with a good “sailor” story!
Why did the sailor become a gardener? Because he wanted to grow seaweed!
How do sailors stay in shape? They do anchor-cises!
What’s a sailor’s favorite day of the week? Wav-y day!
Why did the sailor join a choir? Because he wanted to be part of a sea-soned group!
What do you call a sailor’s hairdo? A “knot-ical” hairstyle!
Why do sailors make terrible poker players? Because they’re always ready to fold!
What did the sailor say when he met his old shipmates? “Long time, no sea!”
What do you call a group of sailors playing cards? A “deck” of cards!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the beach? Because he heard the tide was high!
What do sailors wear to stay warm in winter? Submarines!
Why did the sailor bring a map to the bar? In case he got lost at sea, er… I mean, lost in the drink menu!

Read more: Cruise Ship Jokes

Sailor’s Delight

What did one sailor say to the other about their navigation skills? “You’ve got to be ship-faced to get us lost like that!”
Why did the sailor become a fisherman? He wanted to catch up with his old friends!
How do sailors celebrate birthdays? With a splash!
What’s a sailor’s favorite subject in school? Ocean-ography!
Why do sailors make terrible detectives? Because they always jump to “conclusions”!
What’s a sailor’s favorite fruit? Water-melon!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the seafood restaurant? Because he wanted to see the clam “upstairs”!
What do you call a sailor who loves to dance? A jive-sea!
Why did the sailor bring a net to the movie theater? In case he caught a sea-quel!
What’s a sailor’s favorite game show? “Wheel of Fortune” – they love spinning things!
Why don’t sailors ever get lost at sea? Because they always follow the “nautical” star!
What did the sailor say when he found a treasure map? “X marks the spot!”
Why did the sailor bring a bucket to the beach? He wanted to catch some sand dollars!
What do sailors use to fix things? Sailor tape!
Why did the sailor bring a pillow to the ship? Because he wanted to have sweet dreams on the high “seas”!
What did the sailor say when he lost his ship’s wheel? “I’m steering a bit off course!”
Why did the sailor start a gardening club? Because he wanted to learn how to “sea-weed”!
What do sailors call their favorite songs? Sea shanties!
Why did the sailor bring a backpack to the beach? Because he wanted to have a “shore-thing”!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of math? Sea-rithmetic!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the fishing trip? In case he needed to catch some high tuna!
What did the sailor say when he saw dolphins? “Fintastic!”
Why do sailors make great bakers? Because they knead the dough!
What did the sailor say when he found treasure underwater? “This is deep-sixed gold!”
Why did the sailor become a comedian? Because he had a great sense of “sailor” humor!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of weather? Sail-try!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the desert? In case he needed to climb the sand dunes!
How do sailors stay cool in the summer? They use a lot of sea-SPF!
Why did the sailor always bring a pencil behind the ship? To draw a line in the water!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of sandwich? A sub-marine!
Why did the sailor bring a deck of cards to the ocean? He wanted to play “Go Fish”!
What did the sailor say when he couldn’t find his socks? “I think they’re a pair-a-docks down!”
Why did the sailor go to art school? He wanted to learn how to draw a “sailboat”!
What’s a sailor’s favorite planet? Neptune!
Why did the sailor become a gardener? He loved the sound of “sea-weed”!
What did the sailor say when he discovered a deserted island? “I’m shore I’ll enjoy my stay!”

Read more: Cruise Jokes

Sailor Puns

Why did the sailor bring a bag of peas to the ship? Because he wanted to shiver his timbers!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of dance? The high “sea”-step!
Why did the sailor always carry a broom on the ship? To sweep the decks!
What did the sailor say when he got a promotion? “I’m moving up in rank!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the seafood restaurant? Because he heard the food was on a different level!
What’s a sailor’s favorite clothing brand? Dockers!
Why did the sailor bring a pillow to the shipwreck? Because he wanted to have a “soft” landing!
What do sailors use to fix their boats? Sailor glue!
Why did the sailor become a chef? Because he wanted to learn how to cook up a storm!
What did the sailor say when he found an oyster with a pearl? “This is a real gem of the sea!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the fishing trip? In case he needed to climb up the “fish” ladder!
What’s a sailor’s favorite TV show? “The Deadliest Catch”!
Why do sailors make terrible bank robbers? Because they’re always making waves!
Why did the sailor bring a bucket to the beach? Because he wanted to build sand “castle”!
What do you call a sailor who loves to cook? A seafarer!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the library? Because he wanted to check out the “high” seas section!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of cookie? A ship chocolate chip cookie!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the picnic? In case he wanted to reach the top of the salad!
What did the sailor say to the octopus? “Stop trying to steal my eight-tention!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the gym? To work on his “sailor” abs!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of bread? Anchor toast!
Why did the sailor become a writer? Because he had a knack for storytelling on the high seas!
What did the sailor say when he lost his compass? “I’m feeling a bit disoriented!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the pet store? Because he heard the cats were on the top shelf!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of dog? A sea-man’s best friend!
Why did the sailor always carry a mirror? In case he needed to “sea” himself!
What did the sailor say when he got a promotion? “I’m on the rise!”
Why did the sailor become a magician? Because he wanted to perform “sea-rreal” tricks!
What’s a sailor’s favorite season? Sailing!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the mountain? Because he wanted to climb the highest peaks, even if they weren’t water!
What did the sailor say when he saw a seagull with a suitcase? “Looks like someone’s taking a seagullcation!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the concert? Because he wanted to get to the top of the charts!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of music? Sea shanties and rock ‘n’ roll!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the bowling alley? To reach a perfect “sail” in the game!
What did the sailor say when he discovered a treasure map? “X marks the spot for my next adventure!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the zoo? Because he heard the giraffes were good at giving sailing advice!

Read more: Jokes About Waves

Sailor-Approved Jokes

What’s a sailor’s favorite type of fruit juice? Ocean spray!
Why did the sailor become a DJ? Because he wanted to mix some “sea”-rious beats!
What did the sailor say when he caught a big fish? “This is off the hook!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the theater? In case he wanted to catch a “high” drama!
What’s a sailor’s favorite candy? Lifesavers!
Why did the sailor become an astronaut? Because he wanted to explore the “out-of-this-world” seas!
What did the sailor say when he won the lottery? “I’m swimming in riches now!”
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the supermarket? To reach the top shelf of “seafood”!
What’s a sailor’s favorite board game? Battleship!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the circus? Because he wanted to see the “high” wire act!
What did the sailor say when he found buried treasure? “I’ve struck gold in these here waters!”
Why did the sailor become a barber? Because he wanted to give “sea”-sons haircuts!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the fashion show? To get a better view of the “sail” models!
What’s a sailor’s favorite exercise? The anchor press!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the bakery? Because he wanted to get to the “high”-carb treats!
What do you call a sailor who’s always telling stories? A tale-spinner!
Why did the sailor become a locksmith? Because he was great at unlocking “sea”-crets!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of comedy? “Seas” comedy!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the concert? Because he heard the music was going to be “rockin'”!
What do you call a sailor who loves math? An “arrrrrrrr”-ithmetic enthusiast!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the gym? To reach his “sailor” muscles!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of fish? A “sail”-mon!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the art gallery? To get a closer look at the “sea”-sons’ masterpieces!
What do you call a sailor who’s also a comedian? A joke-matey!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the circus? Because he wanted to “sail” through the big top!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of ice cream? Sea salt caramel!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the bakery? Because he wanted to reach the pie-rs!
What do you call a sailor who loves to tell tall tales? A sea-yarn spinner!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the airport? In case he needed to catch a “plane”!
What’s a sailor’s favorite vegetable? Sailery!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the zoo? Because he wanted to get a “sea”-gull’s-eye view of the animals!
What do you call a sailor who’s always organized? A ship-shape sailor!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the astronaut convention? Because he wanted to learn about “space” exploration!
What’s a sailor’s favorite type of bird? A “seagull”!
Why did the sailor bring a ladder to the library? To climb the “sea”-tions of books!
What do you call a sailor who’s a great cook? A gourmet galleon captain!

Read more:

Navy Jokes

Navy Chief Jokes

Conclusion

We hope you’ve enjoyed this journey through the world of sailor jokes. Whether you’re looking for a good laugh, planning a maritime-themed party, or just want to share some light-hearted humor with friends and family, these jokes are the perfect catch.

Sail on with a smile, and remember, the sea of laughter is boundless!

FAQs

Where can I use these sailor jokes?

You can use these sailor jokes in social gatherings, parties, or simply to brighten someone’s day. They are great for anyone who enjoys a good laugh.

Can I share these jokes on social media?

Absolutely! Feel free to share these sailor jokes on your favorite social media platforms to spread the laughter.

Are these jokes suitable for all ages?

Yes, most of these jokes are family-friendly and suitable for all ages. However, as with any humor, it’s a good idea to gauge your audience’s sensibilities

142+ Sailor Jokes – Hilarious Sea-themed Humor for All Ages